Not lots of piano things to say like last year.
But - emotionally
1. I will not allow myself to be treated like a 3rd calss citizen again
2. I cared more last night about my relationship with my piano and my birds than with J. Which at this point is healthy
3. I did it.
Big fight with O beforehand.
Almost didn't go.
Which meant no more teacher/ no more friendship.
We were both wrong.
M intervened.
I went
It was emotionally awkward.
I was in much physical pain.
But I played
Did my best
It was good in terms of tone and melody
but the fast piece I played too slowly
and
I made mistakes in all pieces! :( Oy
But I am not a professional. I am a student. And I did my best.
And I am proud of myself
And - three great things:
1. O and I made up. I hope we don't have to talk it over today but we might.... if she needs. But we did make up/ each said I love you/ and I am having a lesson today to get new music
2. learned some things about how to grow as a musician.
Including a certain focused careful kind of practice
AND
I HAVE TO play in front of people more. (2x in 41 years not enough lol)
And
3. I played on a 9 foot Busendorfer
like this
