Showing posts with label Gratitudes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gratitudes. Show all posts

Friday, January 30, 2015

Grats 54 - 66 Some Health Things

54. Breath all the time
55. Heart beats healthily
56. How quickly my body responds to sleep, greens, and workouts! : )
57. How quickly my body responds to the "bad" things too - good reminder
58. My ability to heal
59. Working kidneys
60. Healthy blood
61. Eyesight!
62. Hearing
63. Ability to walk
64. Ability to drive
65. Two hands that work so well. For typing, lifting things, cooking, piano, everything!
66. A good brain that has enabled me to get an education and to work.

Monday, January 26, 2015

Grats 53

53. J. called. Wanted to make sure I have all need (snow coming here).
And we are going out next week
And he was endlessly thankful for the iPad (I had one I never use it had been a gift and he needed one for work so I gave to him Dec 30 when we went to dinner)
I have to admit, I am very very grateful for the hope.
I am stronger now, and whatever happens I will accept and be fine and love my own life!
But - I do love him and am very grateful for the hope.
Thankful here.

Sunday, January 25, 2015

Grats 34 - 52

Things "Bad" That Worked Out to Be Good!"

1. J. leaving. All my strengths I would not have found
2. Piano lessons I hated and never wanted growing up. But playing helps save me now, when down. Plus brings me joy!
3. No voice for 8 months. That's when I found my Reiki teacher and Reiki itself.
4. And - I appreciate my voice so much now.
5. And - I came to realize how much of what I say doesn't need to be said, too.
6. Having to work. But work saves me in many ways too.
7. Plus I help others that way.
8. Gaining all that weight. But through it I've found exercise.
9. And - strength
10. And - energ
11. And - confidence!
12. Shyness, fear, and other weaknesses. 'Cause they've helped me to empathize and to help others, including students and adults too.
13. Breathing problems I had. Because I SOOOOO appreciate my breath now!
14. Health problems AND scares last Oct (2013) because I have gotten happily serious about my health now!
15. Doggie with husband and I miss her so. Because I now have the birds.
16. And, because I don't want to walk a dog at night in the cold and dark and I don't have to.
17. And, because I can go out and even go away weekends without guilt over her
18. And, because she is not alone there so much as she would be here.
There are more! I'm just out of time for now!

Monday, January 19, 2015

Grats 17 - 33




17.                  my voice. I remember when I didn’t have it for the better part of 8 months
18.                  an oven. I am roasted vegetables in it today.
19.                  The recipe for creamy curried broccoli soup from Supermarket Vegan. I love it and am making it today and adding beans to it for protein (in fod processor adding them)
20.                  That I am off today, so I can heal – have had a physical thingy going on
21.                  My health
22.                  My dear birds. They are healthy and happy and songful
23.                  That I let them fly about so much
24.                  That I am SO lucky they only poop in or over their (big, flight) cage!
25.                  Knitting.
26.                  That I had the money to get my car fixed Friday.
27.                  Health insurance and that I am able to pay the up-front and the co-pay costs.
28.                  My eyesight!
29.                  My fb communities
30.                  Washer and dryer and place in cellar to hang clothes drying too. Very lucky for this!
31.                  That laundry is in now
32.                  Dishwasher
33.                  That it is on now.

Sunday, January 18, 2015

Gratitudes

I'm gonna start posting some grats each day. Don't care if they're ones I've put in the past or not - BUT - they will not be repeated here! Wonder how many days I can go without a repeat! :)
And - this is NOT coming from a bad or desperate place, but a happy-to-be-alive, hopeful, and content very very grateful place!

PS What got me from suicidal to here is:
mindfulness breathing (albeit sporadically)
lots of time every morning with daily meditations online from hay house and I used to literally type each one here
prayer
just keep going just keep going just keep going
loving friends including EJ being here for me
that I needed a job so I had to do it just do it
giving up all soda including diet soda, and all white pasta, as both make me crazy
I do take 15 mgs of paxil 4 nights a week (sun, mon, wed, fri, just cause it's easy to remember that way) This is different than the way most people take it, which is mornings, every day, and 40 - 60 mg. But this is just right for me
I had therapy for a long time from the desperate times about 4 - 5 years ago till last April
-
when less desperate, what also helped:
good books (including Be Free Where You Are, The Secret, The Magic, and other non-fiction and even fiction that engrossed me including Malakai, The Help, Once We Were Brothers, and many more
piano though not daily
embroidery though only sometimes
getting out more - being with people more
I traveled on my own to London (from New York) for 9 days. The first 4 at a retreat with Thich Nhat Hanh (and I'd been on 3 in Massachusetts earlier) and the next 5 just going about sightseeing. Loved every minute. 2012 end March beginning April. This was amazingly good for me.
I did date someone (husband had left of course) for about 8 months and that was nice for me too.
--
And finally, exercise, eating much better, having something green every day. It all started with Nutribullet MagicBullet last April and a smoothie every day just as a way to get in greens, moved to 21 Day Fix (guide not really DOING or I'd be thin by now) end June, and at that time started the exercise too.
--
Now, I just take things more lightly. I accept about J (husband who left). I see him sometimes but I don't know what will happen. But for the first time IN MY LIFE, I am ok, happy, grateful, and just fine being me.
I. Am. Finally. Whole.
Hope some of this hopes someone else!
==

Grats
1. 21 Day Fix exercises
2. 21 Day Fix food plan (although I have not followed it perfectly at all!)
3. My breath. I used to have such trouble with it. Now every breath goes all the way to my naval. I can hardly believe this! No asthma, no shallow breathing. I am so so grateful.
4. Organic foods
5. My health food store
6. Mindfulness breathing allowed and encourage to be done couple minutes a day with my little students!
7. Soups
8. That I have a B.A. in psychology, a teaching certificate, and a Masters Degree in Theology/Religious Studies.
9. My friends.
10. A, MA, M in particular
11. My mother's great aide, M.
12. My mother's other great aide new: E.
13. My principal, who really seems to get me and appreciate me
14. A piano in my classroom
15. That my kids want to hear it now : )
16. Sitcoms

So - these are not the deepest - but that is a signal about me being lighter now. They are the happy little ones that come to me right now - without spending too long:)


Thursday, November 27, 2014

Thanksgiving Day Special Gratitudes!

1. Thank you, EJ, for giving me the online info you did! I had lost both my blogs, all my emails, everything from being hacked!!!! Am SO grateful, as always, to YOU!!!!! XOXOXXOXOXOXO

Thanksgiving Gratitudes

Of course I am grateful for the obvious biggies: Life, breathe, voice, health, home, car, career, food, water, J, mother, so much. These today, a little different...

1. That I had the horrible experience I had a few years ago, because I am stronger and happier inside me than ever before.
2. Exercise. That I have found the 21 Day Fix, which just showed up on my fb feed one day and I clicked. My life has been upgraded tremendously since that first day I did it, and I will be forever grateful!!
3. Thich Nhat Hanh. Perhaps the three biggest lessons I have learned from Thich Nhat Hanh are: 1) “Life is only available in the present moment.” 2) “…the best way to take care of the future is to take care of the present moment.” And 3) That we don’t have to be unhappy – we don’t have to give until it hurts, which was the way I was raised. That we can breathe in and smile and enjoy the miracle that is our life. THN “I think the real miracle is not to walk either on water or in thin air, but to walk on earth. Every day we are engaged in a miracle which we don't even recognize: a blue sky, white clouds, green leaves, the black, curious eyes of a child -- our own two eyes. All is a miracle.”
4. My principal, who allows me to do more and more of this for myself and my teaching, and to do mindfulness breathing with the children for 2 minutes a day. It is so good for them! Even their families love it!
5. “My” dear birds. They are not “mine.” I just get the honor of caring for them and enjoying their dance, their song, their talk, their looking me in the eyes as I sing to them, their flying overhead so happily, their play…
6. Lessons from non-human animals. Dogs, cats, gorillas, on and on…
7. Reiki. I have very strong Reiki in me and love sharing it.
8. My three closest friends. I am 100% myself at all times with them. As they are with me. We know each other; we accept each other; we love each other. We laugh together, cry together, share meals and shopping and errands and thoughts and feelings, books, work, all kinds of things.
9. Every person who is doing anything for peace in this world
10. Every person who is doing anything to help any part(s) of nature
11. Piano. I went to it kicking and screaming as a child but came around and grew to love it. I love the piano John and I bought together for me; I love playing; I love practicing. Talk about mindful! – It is not possible to think of something else when I am at the piano! : )
12. Embroidery. From when I was in elementary school and had never heard of embroidery, and I used to take a needle and thread from my mother’s “sewing kit” (an old cookie tin). I would make pictures like flowers on a paper napkin or paper towel! One day she saw me doing this as I was doing it on the sofa in the l.r. She said, “What are you doing?” “Making pictures with thread.” “You are? Did you know that is a real thing, and we can buy you fabric or even a kit to do? Would you like that?” “REALLY??!!! YES!!” And we left that minute for John Wannamaker’s. I still have that first “real” one!
13. The compassion I learned from both my parents. And still do.
14. All the walks on dirt path with dog off leash and man by my side – among my favorite things ever
15. Swimming. I may “look like” I am doing an extra slow-motion version of the doggie paddle (which is what I am really doing I’m sure) but I “feel like” a water sprite!
16. The person who introduced me to Thich Nhat Hanh and gave me my favorite book in all the world, “Be Free Where You Are.” I bought 2 more copies, 1 to share get back share get back and 1 to give away
17. London. My week in London and other parts of England was literally the best week of my life (‘til then)
18. My cousin L. I am so deeply grateful that she is back in my life.
19. Fb. I have met the most wonderful people, near and far, and some real friends. I have been able to learn and to share. I have a stream of positives every single morning over coffee: you, art, nature, philosophy, music, all kinds of beautiful things.
20. That I do not eat or wear animals. There are no words to describe how grateful I am for that.
~~ Happy Thanksgiving~~

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Short. Simple. Profound imo


Rushed.
Still,
Short. Simple. Profound imo.

I am very grateful for more order in my house.
And that I did it.

And – that I am not the dependent little thing I used to be like with Ji, or later with J.
I have grown.
A lot.

I am so grateful for this practice each am. Seeing the cloud in my coffee, and in myself. And offering love and compassion to the world. A moment. A MOMENT. Yet transformative.

--

May I today
Offer true internal compassion to all
And
Not sweat the small stuff
And remember – it’s all small stuff

You too, anyone reading this.

Friday, April 4, 2014

has taken a week to come up with but did it -


Trying to come up with NEW gratitudes! Not repeats like water, although I am always intensely grateful for the repeats…

1.      Learning more all the time
2.      Taking better care of myself
3.      Appreciating each day
4.      Good hospitals everywhere
5.      Less fear than before
6.      That I don’t hate math like I used to
7.      Getting up SO early, hours before alarm, and with energy! I think it’s the nutrition!
8.      Walking. I used to do so much of it. Just because it FELT good! And this spring (weather of which should start this week) I shall do more
9.      Even dreaming of walking 2 nights ago. Lacing the sneakers, etc.
10.   Little things, like showering in the morning, are the little deals they shoud be – not the big deals they felt like a little while ago when I was kind of overwhelmed and phobic.
11.   Same with errands.
12.   Deodorant soap
13.   Prayer
14.   Special gifts from the heart from students
15.   My discovery of green chard a few months ago. I love it
16.   I have nice eyelashes
17.   And my cheeks are pretty when I smile
18.   The colorful with bells swing in birdies’ cage.
19.   That one of them sleeps on it every single night. I had no idea how important a swing is! In nature, one bird in the flock always sleeps on a lighter branch so that if anyone comes by, they will be awakened by its easy movement. I just bought the swing ‘cause I thought they’d enjoy it. I am so glad I bought it that first day, knowing now how very important it is to them!
20.   Colorful paints. I just enjoy them.
21.   Being ABLE to just enjoy
22.   Laughter (oops, a repeat : )
23.   The floor cleaner that does not hurt the wood
24.   My nice experience at the health food store yesterday.
25.   Vaca soon. And my determination to not get depressed, as I did in Dec and Feb.
26.   Eating, walking, plans to help that determination come true!
27.   God (oops – another repeat : )
28.   Losing weight for health and self, not jut for someone else.
29.   Gonna buy some clothes soon! Yay! Lucky me : )
30.   So much more positivity than I used to have!
31.   People who work to cure diseases
32.   And those who succeed
33.   A few sources of woods near enough my house!
34.   Drive-ins when I was young. Little, in jammies with pillows and blankets in back with sister and with parents in front. Teen years bunches, dating Ji the two of us.
35.   The few times I’ve bowled. Fun.
36.   That I have been to Disneyland
37.   My parents for buying me a transistor radio at age 10
38.   And all that Girl Scout equipment around same age.
39.   J getting so close to being an Eagle Scout
40.   That I am not in a wheelchair.
41.   That J and I took ballroom dancing
42.   EVERY breath I take
43.   The color coral in nature
44.   Colorful birds in nature
45.   Rocks. Yes, really.
46.   The number of PARENTS who are getting positively affected by our “breathing game” me with the kids every morning for 2 minutes!
47.   That I WANT to be at work. Was actually going to even call in today. But am not REALLY sick. And would rather get SOME done here AND work, then a LITTLE more done here and not work. Doing the right thing is one thing. That FEELING is something else!
48.   And – perhaps the MOST embarrassing thing I’ve ever said here. Or anywhere. Oh my Lord, I have been showering for 3 weeks, in a bathtub/shower with pots and dishes in it. Since the flood. Now I have gotten them out of there. And see how little that issue was and how I should not have let it get to that. But I did. I was overwhelmed. And I honestly think that foods and non-foods have a lot to do with it. Eating boxed and bagged craps took not only my looks, my figure, and my energy, but some of my sanity as well. I have been up since 3:40 this am with energy and positivity.  And this morning, I finally got to empty that tub. Dishes being done 3 x including in dishwasher and by hand. Although they don’t need that much. Just for the ick factor psychologically.
49.   I don’t feel like a compulsive overeater right now. I don’t feel like going to ww or OA or needing to. We’ll see. But whatever it takes, I shall keep this up.
50.   I am not beating myself up over any of the above.
51.   That I get to read, practice piano, and do some French, many days in my classroom (breaks)
52.   Our school library.
53.   Fun. All kinds of fun. Including the surprises I find (just did this minute) in the online jigsaw puzzles. I love the bright, colorful ones that are hard enough for me to go back to them for days. I just found myself saying out loud when I realized it, “Ha! Oh it’s so tiny! I had no idea!”
54.   That that is a metaphor for all my problems too! Lol but really : )
55.   That I am not bipolar. Being so labile is hard enough. Bipolar must be much harder still.
56.   Twirling with my kids the other day, to turn that day around
57.   The parents who appreciate me.
58.   That my parents both taught me, through their own example as much as or even more than their words, compassion.
59.   That I don’t cheat people.
60.   That in my life, I get to help people!
61.   That after retirement ( in 5 ½ years or so) I will continue to help others: people and/or non-human animals.
62.   Dance
63.   The song, “This Pretty Planet.”
64.   Joan Miro. I never really knew her paintings til recently. Wow I love them! (and am doing one as online jigsaw puzzles this is day 3) L. had introduced me to her work but I’d forgotten.
65.   That today I shall find time for my kids to color. Yes. Maybe 10 – 15 minutes.
66.   Brave people. Including me.
67.   Joan Miro. I love her art. Never heard of her til 2 years ago. Then forgot. Now have become reintroduced, through, of all thing, online jigsaw puzzle at jigsawplant!
68.   That I am craving salad lately. And eating a nice one every day. Thank you, Earthbound Farms organic dark leafy greens like kale, chard, spinach…
69.   New chances.
70.   As someone who appreciates the gift of laughter, I am finally able to be grateful that I make others laugh so much!
71.   Trader Joe’s
72.   Frozen artichoke hearts
73.   Sunshine now
74.   Dry day today
75.   Light out when I come home now
76.   Great meeting after school today
77.   Towels
78.   My hair. And compliments on it
79.   People who are praying for me. I cried for two hours this morning could not help it. I dearly appreciate people who are praying for me
80.   I should be back in the bed (not den sofa) this weekend
81.   My dishwasher is working again thank goodness
82.   The floor was not destroyed
83.   Children’s innate appreciate of nature and love for animals.
84.   The silver linings. Like That the garbage built up. So that this morning, VERY early, I went up and down the outside stairs many times. And it made me feel better.
85.   And Like That I have been depressed a few times this week. Bad. Because that got me motivated to exercise
86.   And Like That I was told this would be the worst class ever. Which made me look for ways to make it better, in advance. And therefore, since Day 1, we have been meditating (the brathing game). Which has turned out so great for ME
87.   And that the kids have asked to lead. And each day a different one does now. And I did that for THEM because they’d asked. But I love it and it is good for ME.
88.   Looking for the good and in new ways, all around me.
89.   That J took me to dinner for my March b’day.
90.   More daylight now
91.   Light bulb changing getting better
92.   Big bad things happening with shrink’s wife and he finally called to discuss because she kept leaving messages here. And this week he will come, and we will see what to do about whether to continue at all.
93.   That I have around 100 trillion cells in my body. Working nonstop to give me life!
94.   All. Of. Nature.
95.   That the book The Power says, “To see your health improve, give love to health more than 50 percent of the time. Just 51 percent is the tipping point from sickness to health.
96.   And for everything. 51 percent.
97.   I just read this in “The Power:” “I spend 15 minutes every morning feeling love and sending it out to the world.”
98.   M. calling me this morning.
99.   IMing with A this morning. Both have reduced the loneliness.
100. My Nutribullet green drink this morning.