I MAY Have No More Phobias

Hm.

So I finally did it.
Went through every fucking paper for hours
made the phone calls
took the rides
got everything needed
sent all to lawyer

This may seem like no large thing.

But oh - to me it WAS!!!!!
My three weakest areas,
lawyers
banks
my mother
(in ascending order)
all together equaled MAJOR phobia!!!!!!!!

i wasted time.
Lost this
forgot that
misunderstood the other
had wrong lawyers
put things off
lay around hiding, escaping, praying to die...
BUT !!!!!
THAT -
is over now

I have done it
Yes it cost money and time
and
TONS
AND I DO MEAN TONS(!)  of stress
That I have lived with
viscerally
for like a year and a half
crying
screaming
paralyzed
terror

But I have done it all now.

It is done.

And that - may be the last phobia.

I have been to England by myself.
And I have done this.
Oh Dear God, thank you.
SUCH a relief.

Now I leave for dr. appointment and find out how bad blood sugar and carotid arteries are.

God
Bless
Me.

(And I'm glad I could say that)