Grats from Nov. 1, done in Word because offline due to storm

I am grateful: November 1 3:48 am and miserable. A real test of gratitiudes. Here goes. Only sincere ones of course. Gulp. I am grateful: 1. MA lent me her flashlight 2. L, despite my BIG disappointment in him this week, has been saying loving things 3. And calling 4. And texting 5. And emailing 6. MA had power and I got to charge up my stuff there 7. Dominoes even let me charge my phone there 8. St wants to see me 9. And so does O 10. And M even invited me to sleep there. 11. I am overwhelmed with all these pulls, but so grateful not to be alone 12. I got to see MA’s grandson. What a doll. 13. I have not gone hungry (hardly!) throughout this storm 14. Or waterless 15. My house didn’t burn down 16. I have had nice times with L during these months 17. And lost 25 pounds 18. J had been there for me these days 19. And for my mother 20. My mother is finally going to agree to what she must agree to to get help. 21. She will get the help 22. And maybe even some of my inheritance will be saved. If not, it’s ok; at least she will get the help 23. L helped me with it back in June. I appreciate that. 24. Good books. Like Nicholas and Alexandra, which I am reading by flashnight at this time. 25. My nose is cold but I am not freezing. 26. School is closed until Monday. In a way that’s bad, but in another way that’s good, I guess. 27. O and B both have their power back. Maybe I will soon too. 28. I can see 29. I can walk 30. I can type 31. I can drive 32. I have 15 dollars in my wallet 33. I have some gas in my car 34. And a credit card 35. I ate protein today 36. And dried fruit 37. I can breathe on my own 38. I can talk 39. I can hear 40. My liver works 41. My heart works 42. My kidneys work 43. My intestines work 44. My esophagus works 45. My throat works 46. I finished the book for the course (Run by Ann Patchett) 47. People see this blog. So I am not alone in cyberspace 48. And maybe it helps some people 49. Daily readings 50. Daily prayer 51. I (usually) sleep 52. I can sit up 53. Woods 54. I have walked in the woods with doggie off leash, with J 55. Many times. 56. And I have loved each one of them. 57. Swimming in the sound (I don’t like swimming in the ocean – it is too rough). 58. Thurs morning, 8:10 now. I am grateful that I can eat very carefully today. 59. And maybe shower and MA’s or St’s or even cold and quick, here. 60. And that Dominoes is open (though not for business) and charging my phone again. 61. And that, gulp, I think I am brave enough to tell L the things that are bothering me a lot. 62. And now it is 5:21 pm and I am at my L’s. And very grateful to be here! 63. I was being oversensitive. Am SO GRATEFUL that didn’t have email! So I couldn’t send him my 7-page tome, which was all my own nonsense anyway! 64. And he gave me that warm, loving, welcoming kiss and hug when I got here. 65. And we went and got gas for the cars! Very difficult! The stations where I live AND where he lives are empty and closed! But we managed to get enough. So he can get to work tomorrow and I can get home and to my mother as soon as they’re ready to release her. Phew. 66. And then we went together to the lovely health food store. 67. And they are so happy to see me. 68. And I bought bread, 69. and organic peanut butter 70. to leave here for me! 71. And 2 Amy’s Indian pockets for us, too! 72. And bars for him here 73. And for his drawer at my house. 74. And he bought stuff so we could eat the next few days as long as I’m here (depending on my mother’s needs). 75. And L. put his arms around me, and said, and I quote, while holding me tight, “Oh. The warmth is back in my house.” 76. And here we are now, holed up in his office 77. And he is going to chip in with me or even buy FOR me – a 550 dollar mini Biomat for my bed at home! Oh my gosh! 78. And this morning, on the phone, he was saying about how close we are. Oh how nice. 79. And that I do love him. 80. And he does love me. I can still get upset about the rejection from J. And I do NOT know what will come of this relationship with L, but I feel so good in it right now. 81. My sponsor, who has taught me so much. God bless my OA sponsor! 82. I am grateful for the amazing healthy delicious vegan lunch L. bought for me And we ate together and it was so nice. 83. And for his special little friend. Long story, and no, I don’t mean his penis. 84. Cards. I forgot to bring some with me to leave one for him, but I shall send him one this week. 85. That there was enough hot water in my tank that I was able to take a nice hot bath today and wash my hair, before coming here. 86. That I am about to do Affirmations from my head. To do them. 87. J. His amazing, incredible help for me and with my dear mother. God bless J – may he be happy – and I mean that! 88. I am grateful too, that at this moment, tucked away in his office with my dear L, I feel as if we are away in a cabin somewhere, each drinking our glass of wine together, him doing his emails and me doing my grats. : ) 89. I am grateful for N, the social worker, doing her job and finding the helpers for my mother’s now necessary round the clock care. 90. My mother finally making the very tough decision to do the right thing on her own behalf. 91. The beautiful tree, in leaf, I am looking up at outside L’s window. I’ve never noticed that before. 92. My breasts. I noticed them yesterday, accidentally actually. They are plump and stand up and are quite nice (as the men I’ve been with have told me: ) 93. I am grateful that I had a safe ride here. 94. And beyond safe, but pleasant. 95. And NPR 96. And singing to Nana Mouskouri 97. And that I got to meet her. 98. And she wound up so gracious to us (J, my mother, and me). 99. This wine. It gave L a headache, so he is having the other kind. But I am enjoying this one. And it has such a nice bouquet, too! 100. That I do not have a drinking problem. So I can enjoy wine, and can also go without it. I have an eating problem, but I am working on that – well, trying to surrender it, really. And I do not have a drinking problem, thank God. 101. That L and I stood outside with his neighbors and chatted 102. And then got all the food away. AND 1. I shall practice piano, and play in that concert in the city in January. (Uh oh – lol). 2. I shall play the Schubert. 3. And the Mendelsson. 4. And next June, the Beethoven. 5. For all the hurricane hardships, I am off this week. 6. I don’t have electricity, but I have not had a tragedy. 7. My mother’s apartment did not lose power.