Grats

I am grateful:

1. J made the calls about the furnace
2. I did sleep last night
3. I made the soup yesterday
4. I made the bake yesterday
5. I ate veggies yesterday
6. I remembered to thank God this morning
7. MA says I can shower and/or sleep there
8. I found my cell phone
9. I am alive
10. The carbon monoxide issue didn’t get me
11. Internally gracious people
12. That man who helped my mother by making that phone call for her
13. Eye doctor today
14. Eyesight
15. Warm temps predicted today
16. Shower here yesterday. When washing dishes, realized hot water. Must have been reserve. So jumped in shower. Didn’t have to go to gym or someplace.
17. I could feel much worse. Thank God I don’t
18. New vegan place. Right near work. Amazing.
19. Hope
20. Sponsor (OA)
21. Other sponsor (CoDA)
22. That I can afford books, like program literature
23. That I am literate
24. Today’s For Today: “I choose to put in order my thoughts and hang the walls of my mind with pictures of whatsoever things are lovely and of good report.” Joseph Murphy
25. “Do I have the power to choose my thoughts, my moods? Yes! I can choose to put love at the center of my being, so its warmth and cheer will be with me always.
26. “I do not have to let the world’s doings dictate my moods. I can determine what I want to think about, how I want to be.
27. “When I pray and meditate, I choose faith; I expect the best and make room for it in my mind. I choose to let God’s light be my strength and my joy.
28. “For today: I choose things that are lovely to put in my mind.”
29. Today’s Voices of Recovery: “remembering that our goal is to develop a closer conscious contact wth God, prayer is simply what we do when we talk with our Higher Power, and meditation is simply a way of stilling our minds and opening our spirits to God’s influence.” OA 12 & 12 p. 93
30. …”When I take the time each day to make contact with God, the day goes so much better. I can handle the jouys and the pains without looking for and using food.
31. “At first it was easier to pray than to meditate. My magical mind was always moving, and it took awhile to slow it down and to empty it, so I could listen to God speaking to me.
32. “God speaks to me in nature, in my OA friends, at meetings, and through the work of the Twelve Steps.
33. “He speaks in many ways. I just needed to learn to listen and to follow my heart, not my head. My head can lead me astray. My heart is never wrong.”
34. Voices of Recovery Nov 5: “Food and fear blocked my connection with people and any hope for a spiritual relationship with a Higher Power.
35. “I worked hard, exercised, drank eight glasses of water, prayed, read current events, and groomed daily because I had learned that formula for living a well-rounded, fulfilling life. Every evening I could not wait to disconnect from the world and binge.” Oh my God, that’s me.
36. …”Seven months after I surrendered, first to a sponsor and then to a Higher Power, I lost most of my weight. [My] intuition began to function properly, helping [me] focus on God’s will, both for [my] eating and for the living of [my] life.”
37. Voices of Recovery Nov 4: “All of this experience, knowledge, an help is augmented by a source of wisdom inside us that becomes more powerful as we recover from compulsive eating and develop our relationship with our Higher Power through prayer and meditation.” OA 12 & 12 p. 22.
38. …”Worldly clamors will never cease. Daily, we are bombarded by false advertising, negative news, angry people, problematic schedules, glittering material goods, and enticing substances. When we pause in prayer and meditation, the answers come from seeing with our spiritual eye and listening to the voice of our soul.
39. “Could these be visions and whisperings from God?
40. “Eventually we discover that by living abstinently, we establish or renew an acquaintance with a Higher Power who was within us all along.
41. …”We learn not only to seek, but to connect with, this inner illumination and make it a working part of of our lives.”
42. Voices of Recovery Nov 3 “The phrase is ‘powerless over food,’ not ‘powerless over footwork.’ Another light bulb flashed on, and so did abstinence.”
43. Oh. Ouch. Oh. Voices of Recovery Nov 2: “We thought everything would be fine if only our bosses would recognize our worth, if only our spouses would give us the attention we needed, if only our children were well-behaved…” OA 12 & 12 p. 4-5. The spouses part. Wow.
44. …”During my years in OA, I’ve realized that he key to my peace, not necessarily my ‘happiness,’ lies in turning my life over to my Higher Power one day at a time.
45. “When I do this, the burden of trying to ‘fix’ the problem leaves me.
46. “My years of abstinence prove to me that my Higher Power will hold me and direct me toward action or inaction to help me do His or Her will.
47. Uh oh. And this: “Your will, not mine, be done.”
48. Voices of Recovery Nov 1: “Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.” Step Eleven
49. “The hardest thing I ever had to do was let go of my self-will and turn my life over to the care of God. It has also been the bet thing that has happened to me since I discovered OA.
50. “Through my first honest prayer, I sought knowledge of God’s will for me and the power to carry that out.
51. “But I didn’t know how to really pray. So I started simply by talking to God. Then I would sit quietly and just let thoughts and feelings drift in and out of my mind and heart. That gave me time to hear what God might be saying back to me.
52. “Many times when I’ve been sitting quietly, I have had some intuitive thoughts or ideas about how to handle a problem that is troubling me.
53. “Situations I thought were impossible have miraculously worked out because I remembered to let go of MY will, and let God’s will be done.”
54. I’m scared. I’m scared of that. I’m scared of doing that. Of trying that. Scared even of the quiet time. But I’m thankful for reading it, may it seep in.
55. Voices of Recovery Oct 31: “In OA we have discovered that humility is simply an awareness of who we really are today and a willingness to become all that we can be.” OA 12 & 12 p. 60
56. “Humility is the result of knowing that I am not the doer; you are the doer, Higher Power. When I accomplish a lot, I know it is Your will.
57. “When I have a bright idea, I know You are using me as a channel.
58. “When I can pray for my enemies, real or imagined, You give me the spark that makes it possible.
59. “When I continue to abstain, it is by Your grace.
60. “You are my guide, my inspiration, my motivation.” And please may it be so.
61. In This Moment Nov. 8: “In This Moment, I listen. I acknowledge my falsehoods.
62. “I ask for the truth about myself. As I discover these truths, my relationship with God grows.”
63. I am grateful for the relief I felt in that last sentence.
64. “My recovery improves as I: Listen for God’s message, Let it in, Love myself.” Okay.
65. Nov 7: “In This Moment, I do the footwork. When I first came to CoDA and heard about acceptance and letting go, I though ‘I’ve been doing that my whole life.’ I had been ‘accepting’ my family situation and ‘letting go’ of voicing my needs, over and over. This program had nothing new for me! In a meeting, I heard someone say that in CoDA we do the footwork and let go of the results. I then realized that instead of letting go, I had taken on a victim role. Instead of accepting the situation, I had endured it. Exactly what I had learned from my family of origin! Now, I rely on my Higher Power for wisdom to know when to take action and when to let go.” Okay. Say that again. “Now, I rely on my Higher Power for wisdom to know when to take action and when to let go.”
66. Nov 3: “In This Moment, I own my courage. I am no longer caught in ‘paralysis by analysis.’ I take action. If I find one action doesn’t lead me to my goals, I correct my course.
67. “I have the willingness to let go of everything dragging me down and holding me back.
68. “Even if I feel afraid, I put one foot in front of the other and do what helps me grow in the long run.
69. “I don’t make life more difficult than it needs to be. I am able to laugh at myself and have fun through this process.”
70. Nov 1: “In This Moment, I seek conscious contact with God.
71. “If I have to pick a favorite Step, it’s Step Eleven. When I came into the program, I was hungry to know God. Through prayer and meditation, I journey inward and no longer feel eternally lost
72. “The more I practice meditation, the more deeply I want to know God.
73. “I am captivated. AT the end of my first year in CoDA, I see a huge difference in my life. No more feeling disconnected. No more chaos. I love the CoDA program.”
74. That is so hopeful for me!
75. “Progress not perfection.”
76. The Language of Letting Go Nov 8 “This above all: to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou ‘canst not then be false to any man.” William Shakespeare
77. Nov 7: “Today, I’ll be grateful for all my relationships. I will open myself to the lesson and the gift from each person in my life. I will trust that I, too, am a gift in other people’s lives.”
78. Nov 7: “Enjoying Life do something fun today. If you’re relaxing, let yourself relax, without guilt, without worrying about the work that is undone.
79. “If you’re with loved ones, let yourself love them, and let them love you. Let yourself feel close.
80. “Let yourself enjoy your work, for that can be pleasurable too.
81. “If you’re doing something fun, let yourself enjoy it.
82. “What would feel good? What would you enjoy? Is there a positive pleasure available? Indulge.
83. “Recovery is not solely about stopping the pain. Recovery is about learning to make ourselves feel better; then it’s about making ourselves feel good.
84. “Enjoy your day.”
85. “Today, I will do something fun, something I enjoy, something just for me. I ill take responsibility for making myself feel good.”
86. Nov 2 “Some experts, like Patrick Carnes, call the Twelve Steps ‘a program for dealing with our losses, a program for dealing with our grief.’”
87. “How do we grieve? … Ultimately, by surrendering to the pain.”
88. Oct 31: “All Our Needs And my God shall supply every need of yours according to His riches in glory…” Phil. 4:19
89. “This verse has helped me many times. It has helped me what I have wondered where my next friend, bit of wisdom, insight, or meal was coming from.
90. “Everything I need today shall be supplied to me.
91. “People, jobs, what we have at our immediate disposal, are not our source.
92. “We have tapped into a Greater Source, a source of infinite and immediate supply: God and His Universe.”
93. “Our task is to allow ourselves to come into harmony with our Source.
94. “Our task is to believe in, and look to, our true Source.
95. “Our task is to release fear, negative thinking, limitations, and short-supply thinking.
96. “Everything we need shall be provided to us.
97. “Let it become a natural response to all situations, and all situations of need.
98. “Reject ear.
99. “Reject short-supply and limited thinking notions.
100. “Be open to abundance.
101. “Cherish need because it is part of our relationship to God and His Universe. God has planned to meet our every need, has created the need within us, so God can supply.
102. “No need is too small or too great. If we care and value our need, God will too.
103. “Our part is taking responsibility for owning the need. Our part is giving the need to the Universe. Our part is letting go, in faith. Our part is giving God permission to meet our needs by believing we deserve to have our needs – and wants – met
104. Pour part is healthy giving, not out of caretaking, guilt, obligation, and codependency, but out of a healthy relationship with ourselves, God, and all of God’s creations.
105. “Our part is simply to be who we are, and love being that.
106. “Today, I will practice the belief that all my needs today shall be met. I will step into harmony with God and His Universe, knowing that I count.”