So

It appears we may be breaking up. • He have CHOSEN to not be with his “girlfriend” on his birthday. I’ve never heard of such a thing • I offered over and over – what play would he like to see (as a gift from me, because he likes to go to Broadway plays). I even sent some suggestions. He said there's nothing out there that he wants to see. That he's looked. • But then decided or at least thought about (does he have the ticket yet?) going to one on his own! Not letting me take him. Not inviting me to go with him. NOT wanting to go with me. • WANTING to go alone. On his BIRTHDAY. He, who proclaim to be in a close, loving, exclusive relationship with long-range plans. • And told Jo - his dear female friend, closest friend to him in my opinion, whom he used to date, by the way. • But not me! • He did say to me, “I have absolutely no plans. In fact, so-and-so (a male friend of his, whom I know) called me and asked what I’m doing and I said, ‘Absolutely nothing.’ (Didn’t he think that strange, since you have a ‘girlfriend?’ Or did this not happen at all?) So maybe I’ll go out with him.’” • The lie is the worst of it. Make no mistake -it’s all bad. But the lie is the worst. • I referred 3 times last night, before I knew that, to being surprised that he didn’t want to see me on his birthday. EVERYONE’S assumption was that he would, OF COURSE! Another male friend, with whom we spoke together the other night, even said on the phone to us (in a 3-way conversation) that he thought we’d go away for the 3 days we are BOTH off, and was jealous (3 of L's SIX days off!). He avoided it twice, and the third time actually answered, like he was hearing me express feelings about something unrelated to him, like something at work, and he was so detached, “Yeah. Well.” And that was supposed to be the end of it. Wow. So I have told him that I was uncomfortable bringing it up, but had to. That I felt very bad about this. That I was surprised, disappointed, and hurt. That he has a right to his feelings, lack of feelings, whatever. But that wanting and expecting to talk with me every morning and evening, and see me every weekend, and sleep with me every weekend, and make plans for the future, does not match with this. That he hasn't earned that level of closeness. He was nice, I must admit. Very little defensiveness. Seemed surprised and confused. Said he was NOT trying to make me feel this way...Offered to spend more time with me this weekend. I said, "I do not ask men to spend more time with me. It would have been nice if you'd WANTED to. But you don't. And that's FINE. It just doesn't match with the level of closeness you purport and expect from me." I don't know if he'll even call again. I slept for under 4 hours last night, and awakened before 4 am fully expecting to see an email from him, but there was none. IF he does call, I will not chat. I will say I need him to figure out his TRUTH and explain it to me. Or don't call. Thank you for listening.