1. Eyesight
2. That Jonny Depp has problems with his too, and he’s fine and so am I. We can SEE.
3. Hearing
4. Voice
5. For speaking, but I can also carry a tune!
6. Throat for swallowing
7. Esophagus healthy
8. Tongue healthy
9. Teeth healthy
10. Gums healthy
11. Good brain
12. Never had cancer
13. Never had stroke
14. Never had heart attack
15. Never had ms
16. Or cystic fibrosis
17. Or interstitial lung disease
18. Of kidney disease
19. Of any amputation
20. Or deadly diagnosis of any kind for real
21. Or alcoholism
22. Or drug addiction
23. Healthy skin
24. Healthy liver
25. Healthy bladder
26. Healthy intestines
27. Healthy cervix
28. And vagina
29. And clitoris
30. And veins
31. And bloodstream
32. Healthy oxygen levels
33. Healthy muscles
34. Arms
35. Hands
36. Fingers
37. Legs
38. Feet
39. Toes
40. I have even had pedicures
41. And manicure
42. And used to have wraps for goodness sake
43. I have had massages
44. Fingernails
45. Toenails
46. Healthy nose. All fixed inside after surgery
47. Got through general anesthesia 4 times, perfectly
48. And like a Propofol 3 x I think
49. Do not have asthma attacks anymore
50. Claritin, not even daily, I s all I need for allergies
51. That I can afford the claritan
52. My eye drops – Xalatan
53. The man who invented them
54. And his mother. No. I’m not kidding.
55. Good aides at school
56. Have never had hiv
57. Or tuberculosis (my uncle did)
58. Or polio (my aunt did)
59. Or an embolism (my father died of one)
60. Or an aneurysm
61. Never have found someone dead (O did)
62. Have helped 2 people to not commit suicide. RIGHT IN THE MOMENT!
63. Have gotten help for former friend who was abusing her child – for them
64. Did the right thing when the student of mine was being abused. Did the right thing by her
65. And her parents
66. And the law
67. Having heard from her all these years later.
68. And she is well!
69. And in college : )
70. Standing up for what is right at the times I have
71. Being a generally forgiving person
72. Affirmations
73. K and her help to me
74. Home cooking.
75. That I grew up with it every night.
76. And we had dinner as a family every night
77. And talked (my uncle didn’t let the children talk at the table – oy)
78. That my father didn’t hit me (my uncle hit them – with the belt. And KEPT IT ON THE CHAIR AT DINNER. Made a production of putting it there)
79. Phone calls
80. Pretty dresses.
81. On everyone. Not just me.
82. And skirts
83. Classic yet somewhat feminine clothes
84. Comfortable yet pretty clothes
85. I will have a coat next winter
86. This __________
87. The Roseanne show
88. Two and a Half Men show
89. Beautiful houses
90. Looking at them
91. And in books too
92. All the 127 fb pages I’ve “Liked”
93. All the 58 people I’ve “Friended”
94. Nature
95. Art
96. Music
97. Birds
98. Grass
99. Trees
100. Rivers
101. Lakes
102. Oceans
103. Streams
104. Brooks
105. Woods
106. Forests
107. Flowers
108. Ferns
109. Shrubs
110. Bushes
111. Lilacs – that fragrance
112. Hyacinths – that fragrance
113. Books
114. That I can read
115. That I have helped many other to read
116. That I used to go to volunteer at an orphanage
117. And at a psychiatric hospital
118. Where they put me in CHARGE of 4 real teachers, before I was one, and 18 children!
119. And that I did great at it
120. That I am a decent speller
121. The game, Scrabble
122. And Scrabble on the computer too
123. Movies
124. Videos
125. The main avenue near me
126. The big beautiful park to which I can walk
127. The sound to which I can drive
128. Mountains nearby too
129. I have seen the stars from less lighted areas. So beautiful
130. And some planets!
131. I have taught astronomy
132. And history
133. And math
134. And reading
135. And spelling
136. And cursive writing
137. And neater print
138. And writing
139. And I’m a much better writing teacher than I ever was
140. So many so many students who have loved me
141. And whom I have loved
142. The work I got to do at the other psychiatric hospital too
143. My education
144. That my parents paid for college
145. And I got 2 degrees there
146. And then I got a Master’s degree
147. And paid for that myself! : )
148. And got a 4.0 in it
149. And that J pointed that out to me
150. Good doctors
151. My therapist’s devotion to me
152. And smarts
153. The times I’ve been close with my cousin J
154. And my cousin K
155. And my cousin B
156. And my cousin P
157. And my cousin S
158. And my cousin L
159. And even – very very little time – my bitch sister D
160. My real sister, M.
161. For life
162. And MA
and St
163. And O before our probably irreparable falling out
164. Fb
165. Email
166. Cell phone
167. That mine is now (for over a year) an iPhone
168. My friendship with L. That it is working out after all
169. That MA has finally agreed to let me help her
170. Nutrition knowledge
171. That I’m putting it into place more now
172. And especially as regards my own body: )
173. That even though I’m a compulsive overeater, I helped MA to lose over 30 pounds!
174. And C to lose a lot more than that!
175. That although my dear friend, who is married, wants to sleep with me, I will not do that. I don’t care WHAT state their marriage is in. As long as it is not an open marriage (and probably even if it were), I will NOT DO that!
176. All my vegan cookbooks! Including Veganomicon
177. Vegan with a Vengence
178. Appetite for Reduction
179. Mediterranean Vegan Kitchen
180. Vegan Italiano
181. The Vegan Lunchbox
182. Vegan a Go-Go
183. Vegan Yum-Yum
184. Vegan Cupcakes Take over the World
185. The Joy of Vegan Baking
186. Vegan Table
187. The Happy Herbivore
188. Supermarket Vegan
189. How It All Vegan
190. Fresh from the Vegetarian Slow Cooker
191. The Conscious Cook
192. 365 Simply Delicious Dairy-Free (from library)
193. Nona’s Kitchen (from library)
194. Vegetarian
195. Vegetarian Cookbook for Everyone
196. Although I gave it away because I never used it, I am grateful that a student’s parent gave me “Vegetarian Soups”
197. Vegan Planet
198. Quick-fix Vegan
199. Vegan on the Cheap
200. 20 Minute Vegan
201. The Garden of Vegan
202. Vegetarian Cooking Commonsense Guide
203. That I have a slow cooker
204. Whole Food Recipes. Fro my Vitamix
205. That I HAVE a Vitamix. Wow.
206. Vegetarian Times
207. VegNews
208. Prevention magazine (wow – I really DO have NO excuse to not eat well lol)
209. Vegan restaurants right in NYC
210. And vegan organic items right in my local little supermarket!
211. +2 different great health food stores nearby
212. That I can drive
213. And have a car
214. And a license
215. And a home
216. A roof
217. Fireplace
218. Washer
219. Dryer
220. Dishwasher
221. Stove
222. Oven
223. Fridge
224. Place to having clothes to dry
225. That I don’t use the dry cleaner anymore
226. Wonderful little doggie
227. Summer
228. Jewel
229. Millet for them
230. And organic pellets
231. And seed
232. And organic greens
233. And good water
234. That I have had a nice relationship early on when we were first dating, with L.
235. And nice sex
236. And good sleepovers
237. And fun
238. And care
239. And spirituality sharing
240. And musical sharing
241. And artistic sharing
242. That I have had moments of NOT wanting to be back with J! This is HUGE!!!!!
243. That I have an iPad
244. And it was a gift
245. And a laptop
246. And an iPod. Wow, what wealth
247. Restaurants I have loved/ love. Including in Manhattan, these: Strictly Roots
248. Candle 79
249. Blossom
250. Blossom Café
251. Zen Palate and Caravan of Dreams and Angelika Kitchen. I didn’t really love but I’m grateful they exist
252. V-Spot (Brooklyn)
253. Buddha Bodai
254. Red Bamboo
255. Vegetarian Paradise 2
256. Souen
257. Also a Malaysian one
258. And a bowl food one I forget the ethnicity
259. The restaurant in Williamsburg where J would bring home takeout from when he was in that area
260. All the many many many safe drives he’s had. Including when he was a driver for his job
261. Wine bars I went to with L. I’d never been before!
262. One in Staten Island
263. One elsewhere
264. City
265. Long Island
266. That we never had an accident ourselves nor hurt anyone else. Because I think now, that sometimes he was a little tiny bit buzzed and should not have driven.
267. Every safe ride I’ve ever had
268. Especially the stupid ones when was younger
269. That MA is teaching me to not put others on a pedestal
270. That she was brave enough to point out not only how it is unfair to ME, but how it is unfair to THEM
271. Her pink bubble theory. And when to sweep it out and close it up again.
272. Integral Yoga Natural Foods store
273. Trader Joe’s around here
274. The two they used to have around here
275. Meatless Mondays menu in place around here: )
276. My high school boyfriend’s kisses
277. My first orgasm (later)
278. And every one since ;)
279. Ji and how good he was to me
280. J and how romantic and sexual
281. And also so good to me in a million ways a million times
282. Like when I was injured
283. And later injured again
284. And sick those times
285. And post-surgical those times
286. And when laughing together so much every day
287. And with friend issues
288. And work issues
289. And phobias
290. That I am no longer friends with, and not pretending to be friends with S
291. Or Li.
292. That I will accept whatever happens with O and me
293. J. bringing me the pretty lilac colored yarn when I was sick
294. That I can crochet with it
295. Some free time now. Phew.
296. My mommy
297. That I had one of the best dads who ever lived
298. How he made everyone feel about ourselves
299. That I can write
300. And type
301. Word games. Including the word puzzle in the trashy Globe tabloid magazine. I enjoy it. And I’m not hurting anyone…
302. And boggle
303. And Pyramid
304. and Word Mine!
305. And Spellathon!
306. Draing
307. Coloring
308. Painting
309. Knitting
310. Crocheting
311. Stamped cross-stitch
312. Needpoint
313. Crewel work
314. That I made it up myself on paper napkin with thread from my mother’s sewing box, before I’d ever heard of it!
315. That I sewed clothes for myself as a teen!
316. By hand!
317. Using newspaper for a “pattern”
318. And they were nice
319. And fit
320. And comfy and pretty and wearable
321. And the sweater I knit for self too
322. And for G
323. And for Ji
324. And the blankets I’ve made
325. For Mo’s baby
326. And others
327. And J
328. And self
329. And others
330. Swiffer.
331. Dust cloth reusable
332. Dishwashing liquid
333. Dishwasher detergent
334. Clothes detergent
335. And softener
336. Vacuum
337. Sponges
338. Dish towels
339. Towels
340. Washcloths
341. Soap
342. Hand soap
343. Shampoo
344. Condition
345. 2-in-1
346. faial cleanser
347. Reverse Lift from Serious Skin Care at HSN
348. That when there was violence in this house, no one ever got really hurt
349. That there will never be violence in my house again. At least not that I can help.
350. Books in my classroom
351. The money we’re allowed to spend. I am given literally ¼ of what I was given 20 years ago! And things are so much more expensive! But – I still get stuff: )
352. And pay for some myself. But – can: )
353. The OA meetings that have helped me
354. And the Nar-Anon ones too
355. And the Al-anon ones
356. And the Co-dependents ones
357. And that other one I forget what it was caused
358. Indoor plumbing
359. Electricity
360. That I have a cellar (for the laundry)
361. That J put a window in so second point of egress if emergency
362. The sunroom
363. My birdies getting along so well
364. Bird Talk magazine. They don’t make it anymore but I have borrowed some old copies
365. Birds
366. Giraffes
367. Elephants
368. Zebras
369. Chipmunks
370. Rabbits
371. That 2nd graders call them “bunnies.” So innocent
372. All innocents
373. Thich Nhat Hanh
374. 2005 when J and I went on retreat with him
375. and again in 2007
376. and again in 2009! So lucky!
377. And then when *I * did in 2011
378. In LONDON!
379. I loved loved loved loved that trip
380. That it was the happiest week of my life
381. That M and L and J and my mother WERE involved. But I was alone there
382. Flew
383. Paid
384. Arranged
385. Set up hotel
386. Walked
387. Took buses
388. Tour buses
389. Tube
390. Car service like taxis
391. Went to Kensington Palace
392. Ate at Indian restaurant
393. Ate beans on toast some mornings at local place
394. The best Italian food I (an Italian!) had ever had
395. Saw Buckingham Palace
396. Went to Windsor Castle
397. The Tower! Omg what a day that was
398. Stonehenge
399. Bath
400. The Tate Museum
401. Harrod’s
402. And bought jammies there
403. And a robe
404. And spent like 300 dollars
405. But was treated as if was spending 300 thousand!
406. Was driven straight from airport to L’s
407. To that special seder
408. And slept over
409. And had nice sex together
410. Navigating the airport
411. Learning about these people being there to HELP. Just as I in my job am there to HELP. That there is help available! Big lesson
412. The flight home
413. The 1 times when I felt phobic and used Thich Naht Hanh”s method, “Hello fear…” and it worked!!!!!
414. The peicure I got night before I came home
415. The shower with the new shampoo morning of coming home
416. The trips to the Poconos J and I have had. So many of them!
417. And to Niagara Falls
418. And that I trusted him and went underground to go behind the falls despite elevator phobia 1000 feet down!
419. And it was wonderful!
420. And Montreal
421. And LA
422. Twice
423. And Barbados. On the best honeymoon anyone’s ever had maybe : )
424. When I’ve swam in heated pool
425. Times in the Catskills with J too
426. Time in Poconos with Ji
427. And Niagara Falls
428. And Bermuda with my parents. Despite how much I didn’t want to go! lol
429. My Royal Doultons. Every one with its own story
430. The 3 doggies my daddy bought me in Bermuda
431. And the doggie with the pillow my mom bought me
432. And the little girl with the dog and the book my father picked because it reminded him so of me
433. Autums Breezes. The one I first saw, and with which I fell in love. (In black and white)
434. My parents buying me that one, my first big lady one, in red
435. And the Ballad Seller. I don’t particularly like it, but my parents bought it for me.
436. Even though my mom was in psychiatric hospital, gave it to me for my birthday
437. My Love that they bought me
438. Lynn that I help my father pick out for my mother
439. And she has since given to me
440. And the girl with the dove, that *I * bought for *myself. *
441. The poodle I didn’t love but parents though I would and bought for me
442. And the two little girls my high school friend S bought for me
443. And I didn’t’ want them, but my boyfriend at the time told me I sounded like a spoiled brat when I told him, and he was right. He was bad bad so bad for me in a million ways. But I’m glad for that.
444. That the things he WANTED me to do, degrading things, didn’t quite work out thank God. Because I was just weak enough that I might have
445. That I have never had an std
446. Birdsong
447. Outside and in my house
448. Everyone who is helping the planet
449. Although I don’t really respect him, some of what Dr. Phil says.
450. My mother’s good aides, thank God for them
451. Especially M
452. Good parents everywhere
453. Good workers everywhere
454. Honesty
455. Confidence keeping
456. Humor
457. Biographies
458. My aunt J
459. My uncle C
460. My aunt M
461. My Uncle G
462. My aunt L
463. My uncle F
464. My aunt Ju
465. My Noni
466. My pap-noni
467. My nanny
468. My poppy
469. My aunt R
470. The many sleepovers at the Jersey shore with relatives
471. And with friends
472. And in Long Island
473. And at Aunt R’s
474. That I have a little yard
475. And a front
476. And side
477. And no neighbors on 3 sides
478. Yet am near others
479. My childhood friend
480. And Lo
481. And later Je
482. And B
483. And D
484. And C
485. The second place Ji and I had
486. And the 3rd car
487. And the boat. Wow.
488. The good job I’ve done teaching some of the piano lessons I’ve taught
489. Notebooks
490. Pencils
491. Pens
492. The ones that don’t hurt my neck
493. My pain is much less now
494. Tha I played in the two recitals, one last year and one this
495. And at that woman’s house for her 40th b’day party
496. As a fundraiser
497. And J’s incredible incredible 3 months of patence and support
498. And him driving me there
499. And a million places
500. MA being there for me during the darkest times
501. And me for her
502. O too
503. Both ways
504. M too both ways
505. St to both ways although more for me, as she has a better mental health and life
506. The little tea party as she called it, that I had here with K. My first company since J left
507. The party J and I had
508. The time we had the relatives over and they adored it
509. And very very wealthy, well-traveled, … uncle said never had a better night in his life
510. Air conditioning
511. Lamps
512. Heater
513. Hot water heater
514. My little music box where you can see the workings
515. It cost $5.00!
516. When I was 17
517. I bought it for myself for Christmas
518. And wrapped it and put it under the tree and waited
519. I have always been good at waiting for gifts
520. Ji used to use MY bottom drawer (at my suggestion) to hide presents HE’D bought for me! They were safe there ! lol
521. That I have prescription reading glasses
522. And prescription bifocals
523. And prescription sunglasses
524. That I don’t need a walker
525. Or a cane
526. Or crutches
527. Or a wheelchair
528. The help I’ve gotten from Weight Watchers
529. Dance dvds
530. Little weights
531. Exercise bands
532. Bicycle at gum
533. Swimming at gym
534. Ballroom dancing class I took with J
535. My two weddings (oy lol)
536. I am grateful for orange juice
537. And pomegranate juice
538. And ice water
539. And grape juice
540. And the little white wine I had last night
541. Alarm clark
542. Computers.
543. SmartBoard
544. And when we DON’T use them too!
545. That I had nice things growing up. Like shelves around my bed
546. And Girl Scout things
547. And stationary
548. And my own Christmas cards
549. And good clothes
550. And we went to D.C. twice
551. And Iowa twice
552. And to D.C. a lot with Ji
553. And Atlantic city with Ji
554. And with J
555. Meal with M and MA the other day
556. That I can breathe on my own!!!!!
557. HOPE!
558. God!
559. People who “get” who I am
560. That I am at leaset less shy than I used to be
561. The 10 days in the hospital. So much went wrong. And I hated being there. But J cared. And I made despite their horrible mistakes. And I got to come home
562. M, the little dog we had. The sweetest creature ever
563. And P, this one
564. And that she spent hours at my mother’s the other day
565. Good for all. Mother, dog, J, and aide
566. That my mother can afford all the medicines she needs
567. And gets Meals on Wheels.
568. Thanks to L for teaching me about THAT one.
569. My little elephant statue
570. That I loved reading since little
571. That although I stopped after first divorce, and again recently, I think I am ready again
572. Good book groups
573. For my kids (students) too
574. That I can tell time
575. That I don’t hate math as I once thought I did
576. The beautify to me of the French language
577. That I know a little bit of it
578. That I do accents well
579. And I act well
580. Compassion. Everywhere there is compassion
581. Peace. Everywhere there is peace.
582. Peace on my own street.
583. Poetry
584. My hobby cabinet
585. My breakfront
586. My curio
587. My sofas (2)
588. And loveseat
589. And chairs
590. And table
591. And coffee table
592. And wrought iron table and chairs
593. The flight cage on wheels for the birdies
594. The built in bookshelves
595. I have walls
596. And floors
597. And a driveway
598. And a garage (even though I don’t use it)
599. That bigger than my jealousy, is my utter delight that MA has enough money for her next stage of life (and the rest of her life). To live it well, and with what help she needs. Phew
600. Gardens
601. My bamboo
602. That someone else (I pay) shovels snow for me, such that I can get to work on time!
603. Books for the blind, long before this electronic age
604. Singers
605. That I met Nana Mouskouri
606. And Richared Chamberlain
607. And Peter, Paul and Mary
608. The concerts I’ve been to
609. That there is SO MUCH MORE! I could keep writing on and on and on
610. But also that I’m stopping now
611. And - that I did spend this time doing this today
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