CoDA Work (can't stay away)

I feel today,
all mixed up

Happy about being so much better off than I was and than I could be

Happy that supposedly K. and I will do a little dinner and a movie tonight. I feel like I'd rather stay home than go out with a girlfriend, having spent every New Year's Eve since like 1985 with J, but I think saying yes to "all" invitations is important at this time...

Worried because just saw that roof is leaking

Angry and worried - back and forth - that O still hasn't called me back after we were supposed to go out yesterday, but then she didn't feel well the day before, and she didn't call me to say how she felt, and in two days I have now left 5 messages (over two phones)

Depressed because New Year's Eve is our engagement-anniversary

Upset that I'm not doing enough for doggie

Upset to see my mother in such pain

Okay in the long-run

Back and forth

Plus, now I'm waiting to hear back from K...

But I'm very fortunate.
And just yesterday I felt kind of enlightened. That is not to be forgotten.

Okay. I'll try 5 good things about me.

1. I don't give up.
2. I am a great teacher.
3. I have a sense of humor.
4. I do what has to be done, even when/if it is the absolute minimum
5. I appreciate nature.

Okay