The Magic July 18

July 18

Count your blessings. Make a list of ten blessings. Write why you’re grateful. Reread your list, and at the end of each blessing say thank you, thank you, thank you, and feel as grateful for that blessing as you can.

I am truly blessed that I am feeling like I am home and free. Reminds me of when married to Ji and didn’t have to work, or at least in summers. But – but – have not felt it so much since! Now do again. And not dependent on a guy or anyone else.

Because I have needed this feeling and didn’t even know it until it has come back.

Oh, thank you thank you thank you!

*** I am so happy and grateful for 

the INCREDIBLE love for self and I  like my life right now feeling last night and overnight and when awakened! Omg FINALLY!

Because it is such a wonderful feeling and I have never had it before. Now I HAVE it! And am ENJOYING it!

Thank you thank you thank you!

I am truly grateful for this body feeling!

Because I FINALLY have a body awareness that I love. It is NOT based on a man, or on weight, or on looks. It IS based on the fact that this is my body. MY. BODY. And it is beautiful inside and out. And it works! And I am so happy to hve it. And it feels stronger now. And I love exercising it. And I feel better IN it now!

Thank you thank you thank you!!!

With all my heart, thank you for my insurance company,

Because they call me to remind me when things are due. And – at this point is the cheapest around for me!

Thank you thank you thank you!

I am truly blessed to have so many luxuries. I mean, in this part of the world it doesn’t all feel to everyone like I have so many luxuries. But the truth is I do.

Because I have a piano and a tv and a laptop and a work laptop and an iPhone and an iPad and a Nook and a yard and books and painting things and needlework things and other craft things and a sunroom and rugs and a/c and heat and a roof over my head and a bathtub not only shower.

Thank you thank you thank you!

I am so happy and grateful for the concept of enough. And the reality of enough.

Because the TRUTH is, I HAVE “enough.” I have enough food, water, people, work, play, time, energy, interests, nature, abilities, …enough.

Thank you thank you thank you!

I am truly grateful for the 21 Day Fix!

Because it is saving my life. It is saving my body. It is giving me energy. I tis giving me strength. It is giving me healthy. It is doable and kind of easy even. And I am affording it. (Really only HAVE to pay 80 dollars or so one time fee but I am also using 2 of their products although not necessary. One is a vitamin and one is a protein powder thing).

Thank you thank you thank you!

*** With all my heart, thank you for WANTING to save my life and to live!,

Because  it is a HOLE LOT BETTER than wishing to not be here!

And there was a time I didn’t know I’d ever be able to feel this!

Thank you thank you thank you!

I am so incredibly fortunate and lucky and grateful for not having killed myself!

Because oh my God what a tragedy that would have been. Of course I would not be here. But it would have also hurt J, my mother, the birds, students, loving friends…

I am so grateful to appreciate life now!

Thank you thank you thank you!

I am so incredibly fortunate and lucky and grateful for standing up for myself this morning on phone with bank person!

Because she was unable to help me understand something and I kept asking. Finally she said, “I can’t make it any more clear, m’aam.” And I told her I wanted to speak to her manager. And she said she can’t make it any more clear and “knew I was frustrated.” I said, “I am frustrated because I am a TEACHER. If I try to explain something and they don’t get it, I must find another way! You have said the same thing the same way 5 times. I don’t get it; I’m not GOING TO get it the 16^th time! YOU must find another way to explain it. I do NOT like your fucking attitude. And I do NOT want to speak to you anymore!”

I got someone else.

Ok – in future I can be calmer without word fuck. But I am glad I did it!

Other person never came through, meetings etc (bs). But I called back and got someone else and it is all done. PLUS what they charge EIGHT DOLLARS for in person, they did for me for FREE on phone! Yay

Thank you thank you thank you!

I. Am. Enjoying. My. Own. Company! Omg!
Thank you thank you thank you!

I. Am. Making Sure to Get Out Virtually Every Day Becasue Need to Be around Others too.
Thank you thank you thank you!

Thank you so much! Thank you thank you thank you!

I am changing!

I have hope!

I am fine in the moment!

Thank you thank you thank you!!!

2. Remember The magic by counting the blessings of yesterday and writing them down. Ask yourself the question: What are the good things that happened yesterday? Scan the surface of yesterday until you feel satisfied that you’ve remembered and written down all the blessings of the day.

1.      Great 2 ½ hour tea at bookstore date with St!

2.      Good friend

3.      Book store

4.      Tea

5.      All of it to be thankful for

6.      Magic Rock practice (of course)

7.      Enjoying every little thing while driving about. Enjoying driving

8.      Enjoying the weather

9.      The sights

10.   The sounds

11.   The freedom

12.   Got through phobic feeling thing had to do for mother! DID it! FOUND a way when 1^st TWO didn’t work out!

13.   Had French lesson

14.   And it was good: )

15.   Was able to have it in a/c first time : )

16.   And earlier time which was nice

17.   Chat with M

18.   Filled out last thing for Ma mother-aide. They finally took care of THAT!

Thank you thank you thank you!