Feelings Work

I feel and I think it is because: Betrayed by L. and betrayed by self. Better than yesterday. Desirous of sleeping to escape. Nervous that I'll never be loved the way I want to be, and never be able to change so that I won't need that kind/amount of love. Surprisingly ok in the moment though. Because I don't think the things L. did were so bad; I think his "friends" S and J presented them badly. AND I am so needy about being first... Still problems regarding his sex stuff (and lack thereof!) and the mental illness thing. Very desirous of practicing piano. And that's nice. Because I've found that it's a very mindful thing to do. Plus working both sides of the brain at once? Plus hearing "music?" Also, the okayness is, I think, because of acceptance. And letting go of expectations and going more with the flow. Thank God! Next time I'll do differently: Keep doing every single day. Keep trying to live in the moment. Try meditating! Read the Five Mindfulness Trainings MORE. 5 Good Things about Me: 1. I am pure-hearted 2. I am honest 3. I don't sweat NEARLY as much small stuff as I used to. 4. I can type quickly 5. I can play piano