My 100 Gratitudes Today

I am grateful: 1. Remembering that our challenges offer us the lessons we need in the school of life makes them more acceptable. In time, as our recovery progresses, we'll even look eagerly to our challenges as the real exciting opportunities for which we've been created.” 2. This: “When we have confidence in our Higher Power and in ourselves, we are willing to try even though we may fail. If we fail, we are willing to try again. Since our will and our lives are turned over to God, as we understand Him, we have confidence that everything eventually works out for good. You are the source of confidence.” 3. And this: “"We have no right to ask, when sorrow comes, Why did this happen to me? Unless we ask the same question for every joy that comes our way." Philip S. Bernstein” That’s a huge huge lesson and very necessary for me. 4. And this, which I certainly hope IS true: “But gratitude doesn't always come from being a receiver. Gratitude is warmest when it accompanies the joy of being able to give without expecting anything in return. We find it isn't enough to feel grateful. We have to express our gratitude by showing kindness and service to everyone around us.” 5. And this: “How can I show my gratitude today?” I don’t know. Good question! 6. This: “I pray that I may be truly thankful.” 7. This: “Rather than inhibiting us, the kind of control we develop through this program liberates us from the bondage of self-will.” 8. And this: “Control my life, I pray.” 9. I – have just made dough! I haven’t done this in many years! Decades! 10. I THINK I want negative and dirty-feeling people out of my life. 11. L. is crazy and I have made a list of why it’s okay to be without him. He is nice and has compassion and cares for me, and is brilliant and funny and fun, and good in bed when he gets himself there, but he is crazy. And I’m sorry about that. But he lives in a state of good enough happiness. And what I’m grateful for here is that I have the list of why it’s ok to be without him. Although I MAY still spend SOME time with me, I’ll need that list to help me with expectations and self-strength, and moving on. 12. Breath came. Good. 13. I am so grateful that I can breathe on my own. 14. This: “When we are able to keep a quiet center within ourselves, we are truly in tune with the spirit.” 15. And this: “Just as the snow falls softly, without fear, without regard for whether it will land on a tree bough or in the street, we, too, can live our lives with peaceful acceptance of whatever comes along, knowing it comes to us naturally and from God.” 16. That I am trying to take it light. Dishwasher broken; just do dishes each time use. Just put away what use. Not look to bigger things right now. Have been too depressed for like 5 weeks. 17. God is with me. God is with me. Yes. Thank you, God. Okay. 18. This, that: “Letting go is one of the simple yet profound spiritual tasks taught by many of the world's religions.” 19. Wow: “Knowing how to be poor means knowing how to have a full and rich life without a dependent relationship with material wealth, food, chemicals, or sex.” 20. Or dependency on one other person? 21. “I don't expect to know everything, but my Higher Power can guide me and show me how to let go.” 22. “These meditations can teach us how to relax.” 23. “We can be of service to other people in a small way, at least.” 24. “And we can be happy while doing it.” 25. “ We should not worry too much about people we cannot help.” I am grateful for all of these thoughts. 26. “We can make it a habit to leave the outcome of the things we do to the Higher Power.” BUT WHAT ELSE SHOULD I BE DOING? Oh well, grateful for the thought anyway. 27. I SHALL do whatever I have to do. Perhaps no more, lol, but whatever I have to. Like, I’m kind of shaky, but I “need” a few items from the store. I am an inch away from asking someone else as a favor. But no. I shall go. In just a little while. 28. The herbal organic bre-drink I have here. 29. And seltzer 30. And water 31. And organic apples 32. And blueberries 33. “We can go along through life doing the best we can, but without a feeling of urgency or strain.” Oh, yes. May this be so. 34. “We can enjoy all the good things and the beauty of life,” Yeah? Good!! 35. “but at the same time depend deeply on God.” 36. “I pray that I may enjoy the satisfaction that comes from good work well done.” 37. My dough is inside rising now. 38. Spinach 39. Electricity 40. Doggie here 41. Claritan (especially since doggie here lol) 42. A little walk this morning 43. And it was brisk out and the air was crisp and nice. 44. That I ate the broccoli yesterday. 45. Affirmations 46. This: “Negativity is only a thought and a thought can be changed. I choose to replace all negative thought with positive healthy thoughts that nourish me on all levels.” 47. “As I learn to love myself more I also learn to share love with others.” 48. Maybe I will make a manifestation board. 49. “I am now ready and willing to embrace the changes I want in my life.” 50. “I accept change and I trust in life.” Oh. Good one. 51. “I am safe.” Wow. 52. My voice 53. My lungs feel clean today. Cleaner, after than toxic air situation yesterday. 54. Clean dishes 55. Heart beating for me 56. Eyesight 57. Freedom 58. Buddhism 59. Catholicism 60. This day off to take things at a slower speed. 61. I will get the dishwasher fixed or replace it. 62. Dishes 63. Glasses 64. Flatware 65. Cups 66. Specialty cups and saucers. 67. Including antiques 68. Teapots 69. Including and antique one. 70. Mugs 71. Teas 72. Coffee 73. Instant coffee 74. MA 75. L 76. Ml’s influence 77. St’s friendship 78. M’s love 79. My mother. Thank God. 80. J. For so long. And still. 81. Washing machine 82. Dryer 83. Place downstairs to hang clothes on the pipes. Doesn’t have to be like in my face up here. 84. This advice – for all of us – “able to be with him, and still stay open to other men and the things that were important to her. Things that had nothing to do with men.” 85. Reading this about someone real: “She felt so comfortable with herself and her life that, even though she loved him and he KNEW she loved him, she never gave off that feeling of desperation.” 86. And this, which is HUGE – no matter about what man! “She never got angry. She never got suspicious or distrustful. Because she knew she was making the choice to be with him.” 87. And this, which I really need to internalize too. I’m so glad I opened that (professional from a company) mail just now! “And when she felt too intensely, or sad, or upset, she stepped back enough to get her bearings and see if she wanted to choose to be with him even one more day.” 88. “He's not doing anything wrong, he's just doing what he feels like doing 89. “He isn't thinking about your future, or what's good for you 90. “He figures that you, just like him, are where you are because that's where you want to be. 91. “I used to blame my "boyfriend" for "leading me on." But it wasn't his fault. He might have been taking advantage of my "waiting," but, he didn't even see it as taking advantage. He just saw me doing what I wanted to do, just like he was. He wasn't about to take responsibility for my feelings. 92. “"Waiting" is putting your life on hold. But, letting a man take as much time as he wants to make a decision about what he wants in the relationship doesn't have to be about putting your life on hold! 93. “Don't PRETEND you're busy, unavailable or that you don't care. Pretending will work completely the OPPOSITE of how you want it to work. 94. ‘Instead, you have to BE busy and unavailable. And you have to CARE. And the person you have to care about most is YOU. This means, you care how you live your life. You care if you have fun or not. 95. “Date other men, or at least Date Yourself” 96. “Touch objects and really sense what you're feeling - this helps you connect with your feminine energy, which is very attractive to a man” 97. “Make up some rules and boundaries for yourself, and learn to speak to him from your heart 98. “you will never put your life on hold for any man, and that you are not a woman who "waits." 99. You are a woman who "lives." 100. Hope 101. That nice guy from Connecticut with whom I’m communicating. 102. That doing my spiritual work today has helped a bit. Yay oh thank you, God. 103. I’m about to go to the store right now. 104. My dr. might well come today.