I am grateful: 1. Reading this today: We have each had days when we preferred hiding under the covers, avoiding life at all costs.” Because that means with me feeling that way now, I’m not the only one. 2. “The more fully we commit ourselves to one another and to all our experience, the closer we will come to the very serenity we long for.” 3. “Fear fosters inertia, living us separate, alone, even more afraid. But we have an appointment with life.” 4. “And our appointment will bring us to the place of full understanding, the place where we'll be certain, forever after, that all is well. And that life is good.” 5. “It is time to let it go. It is time to let him or her go. That doesn't mean we can't love that person anymore. It means that we will feel the immense relief that comes when we stop denying reality and begin accepting. We release that person to be who he or she actually is. We stop trying to make that person be someone he or she is not. We deal with our feelings and walk away from the destructive system. We learn to love and care differently in a way that takes reality into account.” 6. Yesterday’s conferences going amazingly well. 7. That mother who said, “I now see life through ___’s eyes. And it’s beautiful.” And she smiled and smiled. 8. So many happy-to-be-parents parents. So nice. 9. And none were judging me. They were learning about their child at school. As it should be. 10. I know today I have a bad one coming. But I have “backup” during it… the lrc teacher. 11. “Many of us had a primary relationship with a substance or an addictive behavior, and people had only second place.” I’m grateful that maybe I don’t have to do that anymore. 12. And this: “Many of us were so lost in our codependency that our relationships were two-dimensional. We didn't know how to be there with our whole selves.” Maybe I won’t need to be like that anymore either. 13. This morning spiritual work. It feels good. It sets me up well too. 14. Coffee this morning. I am out of it now, but I had enough for this morning, yay. 15. Organic chocolate coconut milk in it. Yum. 16. I do not feel as bad as I did yesterday morning. 17. Every diamond I have ever had 18. Every nice coat too 19. That I do NOT wear fur! 20. Or suede! 21. Or leather! 22. Or pearls 23. My Royal Doulton figurines. From the days when they were special (and before I knew about bone china). 24. Gifts from my parents to me. 25. And from myself to me. 26. Every bit of gold that I have 27. Swarovski crystals. 28. That I’ve designed and made some nice jewelry 29. Pretty, whimsical jigsaw puzzles (particularly Jane Wooster Scott). Like these: http://www.puzzlesforsale.com/search.php?mode=search&page=1 30. I’m grateful that I’ve never been hit by a train. 31. And never been the victim of THAT KIND of violent crime 32. Or witnessed it either. 33. I’m grateful that (it being Wed AFTERNOON now) I have finished all my conferences. 34. And all of them went well! 35. And that the kids are happy. 36. And the parents seem grateful 37. And that *I * should have some of the credit for both of those things! 38. My dr. is almost here 39. He will help me about L. 40. Christmas will come 41. Maybe it won’t be hell. 42. Maybe it will even be nice. 43. Maybe I’ll even get to put up a tree. Littler but nice?...I don’t know. But maybe! : ) 44. That M loves me 45. And I love her 46. That I helped Jo this morning. She is overboard, and it turns out that she MAY NOT HAVE needed it, but – when someone mentions “thinking about suicide, “ I’m gonna help! 47. And that I ate the little sandwich and nice organic apple. 48. And that tonight I’’ll have a nice salad 49. With some protein 50. And some “grilled cheese” (vegan and toasted, really). 51. That I read that great special edition of Vegetarian Times today, for healthy eating for winter 52. And that although I don’t have a dollar in my wallet, and am overdrawn by over a thousand in my checking right now (!), I have enough food in the house. And healthy too. 53. That M. gave me great thematic sheets for the kids 54. And we WILL get through til vaca 55. And then there WILL be a vaca 56. And I shall exercise! 57. And eat well! 58. And take care of my spirit 59. And my flesh – like baths and stuff 60. And knit 61. And practice piano 62. And play piano too 63. That I am ok today. Not ill. 64. Not suicidally depressed. Haven’t been so in a long time, in fact! 65. That I have my eyedrops 66. And my Paxil. 67. Which I am allowed to and can skip sometimes 68. And am on a very low dose anyway : ) 69. That the probability is that I WILL have orgasms again someday. 70. And that I will get to the heat in here this vacation. 71. And pay it off 72. And I do have heat in most rooms today 73. And I did some dishes 74. And tonight I will throw in a load of laundry 75. Water. Always so grateful for water. 76. And that I can speak. I remember when I couldn’t. 77. That my two quietest girls are opening up! 78. That these kids have nice parents 79. That they are my class this year 80. That I have a piano in my classroom 81. That we have an Artist-in-Residence 82. When professionals respect each other 83. And non-professionals too 84. That for almost 5 years, as an adult, I didn’t have to work full-time. : ) 85. That I am ok working full-time now. 86. ALL these YEARS! 87. That I even GET something out of it! 88. My mother 89. I’ll have doggie this coming weekend!! : ) xo 90. Chatting with colleagues today 91. Safe drive up 92. Got there on time 93. Safe drive home 94. No work have to do tonight 95. Not behind on work deadlines. Many here (!) yes, but none at work. Phew : ) 96. Smiles. Mine. 97. Smiles. Others’ 98. Fireplace. *I * have a fireplace! Lucky! 99. I believe I will sleep tonight. 100. My bed