The Hopes and the Changes

1.
Some of the hopes

The birds
bring me a smile
and joy

I was not so happy and well off with J either

I am starting about 10 weeks off, minus a little work this weekend and Monday, and a week in August. I will do the math later.

I have gotten a little consequence at work (in terms of a couple of parents not loving me) for my lack of P.R. and my absences which are all seen as sick days even thought they're not. Also I do have too many sick days.
And yet, I am still a great teacher, who makes a significant difference in the kids' lives. In curriculum, and self-esteem, work habits, social skills, everything. And some parents go far out of their way for me years after, still remembering me as the biggest difference-maker...
And my principal loves me.

Despite thinking I "need" J to do my job, haven't I just done it for 2 1/2 or 3 years without him? INCLUDING setting up and closing down the classroom. And packing for camp....

I have more than 3 friends whose parents were both in concentration camps. I honor this very deeply. And they survived. And went on to have lives, marriages, jobs, children... Things happen. Bad things. Worse things than I can imagine. So the coincidences of things in my life "this happened and right after it that...." are NOT so big. We ALL have problems. Mine are not what those people's were.

I am great at new starts.

I HAVE come back from some BAD things. Like the crazy mother and the abuse and the physical problems the year unable to work etc. etc.
I am GOOD AT coming back.

More later.

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When N. said today, I'm looking at tiles and (I forget what else) I'm in house mode, I envied her.
But then I feel BAD that I "have to" fix up this place.
Huh?
:)

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A new start
can start
at this minute

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