Today's Gratitudes

I am grateful: 1. 1. That L and I have been together for almost 4 months 2. My doctor 3. L said wonderful weekend – not elaborate – just being with you, it was a total delight! 4. And the sunshine… 5. And I said it was like it was touched by a magic wand 6. That M is my close friend like sisters should be. 7. Every time I have any kind of good feelings about myself. 8. That although I didn’t so much last night, it all turned out fine. 9. The flowers comments Sat. L: “Who bought the flowers?” (like uh oh) Me: “I did.” L: “Oh I should have brought you flowers.” . . . So sweet 10. That he tried to straighten up the sunroom. Without my asking, of course! 11. That I don’t have cancer. 12. That I talked with my sponsor this am 13. That I sent L the picture letter this morning and he loved it 14. That I do those picture letters. So fun. Never knew anything like it before 15. 5 more days of school. Phew. 16. And then no more of the disgusting saboteur aide! Sorry to feel that way, but do. 17. That I am healthy 18. That I have food. Good food. And plenty of it. 19. And my two hands 20. That both work 21. And my two feet 22. That both work 23. And a shower 24. And a bathtub 25. And enough time in the day. Oh, I always *feel * behind and lately with recital coming up, a bit overwhelmed, but I do really have enough hours in a day. Not like I’m working 5 jobs or something. 26. With divorce and mother stuff, so grateful that AM getting through it all 27. That although M is now in the profound loneliness stage, it does mean (and I was able to tell her this) that she is that much closer to the exit out of this box of hard times. 28. That I appreciate people on the spectrum. 29. And now it is June 23. And I shall pick up from there. I am grateful that I got out of school for the summer yesterday. 30. AND BIG TIME(!) that I DID do the stuff to be ready for today. Rather than thinking I was too tired and needed to put this off. 31. That I had a mani-pedi today. 32. And a nice long hot shower. 33. And that I got up at 3am (!) and cleaned up the place. 34. And L is here 35. And so is K (Reiki person) 36. And they are having session right now – double 37. While I am in here doing my spiritual work 38. And my doggie is here! I haven’t seen her in 3 months! And she is here now. 39. And she smelled like the dust-house in which they live. So I bathed her. 40. Another thing I didn’t want to do! And have never done before! But I DID it! 41. And it was awesome! 42. And SHE seemed to feel good too! 43. And I blew her dry some 44. And gave her yard-sunshine 45. And right now she is happily “dug in” to her little box that she loves so much and that is always here and left open for her. 46. I am grateful for her plume tail. 47. And that I did bathe her, for L’s sake. 48. But it was also nice bonding for us! 49. AND – it made ME feel like a competent person – woman! Wow. 50. That I packed that classroom. 51. And redid what custodian said I had to. 52. And it was hot and humid and I was sore and tired and thought I couldn’t do it, or couldn’t do it right, or couldn’t do it enough, or certainly couldn’t finish in time. BUT I DID!! 53. I am grateful that I didn’t miss this day. EVERY OTHER SUMMER I miss these first few days. Tired, lying around, “free time” til July… Well THIS is FREE time too! And better! 54. And my house is at least in some sort of order. 55. And from today on, people could even stop over without notice! Drop in! YAAAY! 56. I am grateful that L and I kissed romantically as soon as we saw each other. 57. And for a nice long time, too. 58. And that we always do. I don’t want to be his friend or brother/sister type thing. 59. And that I’m actually ok on the nights when I’m sleeping alone. 60. My mother is out of the hospital and out of the nursing home rehab place. 61. And I helped her so much. 62. I just kept doing “the next right thing.” 63. I am so grateful for my sponsor! Who guides me to calmness and sanity and serenity. So grateful. 64. And – grateful that cancelled dr. this Wed (3 days ago). 65. I am grateful that I have a spinach salad in the fridge right now. 66. And that K is staying for lunch. I am VERY shy and kind of afraid of the socializing, but we will do it. And we will be fine. 67. I am grateful that this day, I am not destitute. 68. And that this day, I am even comfortable. 69. And that I have that little Coby thing for the Reiki music in there. 70. I am grateful for my piano. 71. My Bach piece. 72. My Reinhold piece. 73. And, gulp, my upcoming recital. 74. And for lots of time to practice now! Starting tomorrow – when L leaves. And Monday, Tues morning early before I leave, Wed when I get home, and every single day for as much and as long as I can. 75. And that I HAVE been practicing and trying my best. 76. And for the sense of spirituality that has overcome me today as I was driving to get Phoebe and K was already here with L. 77. And that I called and spoke with my mother. 78. And visited a bit with her and her dear friend M yesterday 79. And took her shopping. 80. And set up the Meals on Wheels interview for her on Monday. 81. I am SO GRATEFUL for the sense of new start I had yesterday. Pink and clean and hopeful and all kinds of good and new. 82. And that L said yes to me and him doing our scheduling work TOGETHER at his house Tues! 83. Before we take the ferry and go to dinner with 1 or even 2 friends in the city 84. And then the concert! So exciting. 85. And for the gifts I did get from the students’ parents. 86. I am actually grateful for that video of the girl orgasming. It is not disgusting porn type stuff. I find it beautiful. 87. And I think I might show it to L later. He’d like to see it. Again, it is not like gross porn type stuff. 88. I am grateful that my principal liked me. 89. And that I can exercise EVERY DAY NOW! 90. And that I have fresh, clean water. Plenty of it. How lucky! 91. And bananas. 92. And a peach. Both in the kitchen right now. 93. And that doggie seemed to be looking for her OTHER food when she got here! The food *I * usually have for her. I’m so glad! 94. And that I HAD a couple of treats left for her. Will buy more too. 95. SO HAPPY TO HAVE HER HERE! 96. I am grateful for the REALLY PRETTY thongs (flip flops) I am wearing right now. 97. And the pretty top 98. And the pretty bra 99. And that my hair looks so nice 100. And my face 101. And my little makeup 102. ***And that I didn’t kill myself! Thank you, God, for all the gifts!