Dear God

I have done all I could for now, I think.

I have written J a letter. I have worked on it for a long time of notes and digital recording notes, and put it together yesterday and today, and tried to keep it short and not annoying.
I have prayed on it, and slept on it. A number of times.
We had a nice walk in the woods with the dog, and I'm very grateful for that. And then I gave it to him.
I have e-mailed 16 friends begging for prayers. I have prayed before that, of course. And even prostrated myself.
Now maybe I'll e-mail my cousins, who don't know what's going on, and just ask for prayers for very special intention?

And I have taken a (prescribed) 5 mg valium.

Now I shall eat an abstinent dinner.

God, I will keep my promises to you. About how to live and the example, and prayer and church. And the kind of wife I will be.
And I will continue working on my*self.* The self you made and I've screwed up but am growing and changing.

Please Dear God my Father, heal my marriage with J.
Please Jesus, who gave your life for our sins, heal my marriage with J.
Please Holy Spirit, whose grace moves among us, heal my marriage with J.
Please Blessed Mother, assist me in this my necessity, and intercede and heal my marriage with J.

I think of the good we used to be able to do as a couple, and that was when we were messed up. Imagine the good we *could* do.
And the energy I could free up from this worry and give to others.

Please Dear God, continue to heal me and help me to pray to you wholly, and to do the footwork and become the best that I can be.
And please heal my marriage.

Our Father who art in heaven. Hallowed be Thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen. For Thine is the Kingdom and the Power and Glory, now and forever, Amen.

Hail Mary, full of grace. The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women. And blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now, and at the hour of our death. Amen.

Glory be to the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, now and forever. Amen.

God, my creator, please help me now. I need you.
Thank you.
Love.