Dear God

Dear God,

I need to talk to you.

I awaken so miserably. Please help me with this.
I have terrible troubles taking care of myself and my finances and my home. Because I don't want to be here - in this home, on this earth, here at all - alone. So I don't contribute enough to my own welfare. Please help me with this.
I have many people who love and like me. So I must be nice. Please help me to care about myself.
And God, I ask you please when time passes and J finds himself, please heal our marriage.

I don't feel like a person. I don't feel like I exist when not with J or someone.
This NEEDS to change. Please. I'm doing all I know how. Please change it. I ask you.

Help me, Father. I come to you in pain.
Thank you.
Amen.