Grats

I am grateful:

1. I’ll get to help M with her plans today
2. Some of the furnace work is done
3. There is some heat this morning
4. J was a huge help yesterday
5. I have hot water
6. That I get to blog
7. That I did 16 report cards yesterday
8. That I took that work phone call last night
9. My thumb’s still okay
10. Doggie in bed with me last night. She goes today but I’m glad I’ve had her these days
11. Will take hot shower or bath this morning
12. That I did a load of laundry yesterday
13. Although such bad dreams, that I slept last night
14. That J called as soon as he got out last night.
15. Hope
16. That I got through November 15
17. Today’s For Today: “There is no security on this earth – there is only opportunity.” Douglas MacArthur
18. Good talk with sponsor yesterday
19. “We who are recovering from compulsive overeating believe that we ‘never have it made.’
20. “But we also know that each day is an opportunity to begin anew.”
21. Opportunity to begin anew. That’s huge.
22. Then it says: “Recovery is for those who want it and are willing to grab hold of every opportunity to achieve it.
23. And “There are no guarantees that we will be free of our disease six months or a year from now.
24. “Recovery, like abstinence, is attained one day at a time.”
25. And seeing someone who was on ww for a year as of yesterday, and how she’s changed. That gives me an idea about a year from now.
26. “For today: OA offers opportunity, not guarantees.”
27. Opportunities
28. Today’s voices of Recovery: “Going to any length means taking Twelve specific Steps, one day at a time, and never being finished.
29. “In the process, sanity will be returned
30. “and abstinence will become a reality.” For Today p. 33
31. “A speaker at an OA convention once shared that he would have been wiling to sit naked on a fireplug and hand out leaflets if that was what his recovery required.
32. “Fortunately, our program requires no single act of daring.
33. “Instead, we are shown a path to follow the rest of our lives.
34. “For those of us who sought a magic pill or diet to cure our overeating, the ‘fireplug program’ might seem easier than practicing the principles embodied in the Twelve Steps. Our program tells us that through ‘the process’ of working the Steps daily, sanity and abstinence will be found.”
35. Maybe tomorrow morning, I will start giving daily time to the steps again. 10 minutes a day even, to Step Eight.
36. “We who have followed that process for a time, and then became distracted from it, have found that sanity and abstinence are hard to maintain without it.”
37. That goes with my idea about step work again starting tomorrow.
38.
This program promises real and amazing recovery.
39. “Hopeless bingeing is replaced y healthy eating.
40. “Excess weight disappears
41. I live more in the day now.
42. More in the moment even.
43. I can even enjoy a something without worrying about future implications.
44. Maybe J can too, soon.
45. Maybe we can even go away and just enjoy a couple of days as friends. I would like that so much.
46. After “Excess weight disappears,” it says, “without diets, purging, or excessive exercise.
47. “We can live free of the obsession with food and eating,
48. “day after day,
49. “for years at a time.
50. “But none of this is automatic. We have to be wiling to live the Twelve Steps daily, in order to keep our recovery.”
51. That’s huge to me.
52. “That’s what we mean by ‘going to any length.’”
53. I *think * I’m grateful that my dr’s coming today. I almost wish he weren’t. I’m so tired, and just want to come home later and sleep. Also, I don’t know if he can help me. I’m afraid. But he hasn’t been here in weeks, and he can’t come next week, so I feel like I am or at least should be grateful.
54. That I’m still doing my hand exercises.
55. Today’s In This Moment. “In This Moment, I leave the past behind.
56. “I woke after a fitful night, spent obsessing about the past and the pain I suffered.
57. “I assigned blame to others and plotted revenge.
58. “This morning, my CoDA recovery clicked in.
59. “I remembered that rehashing the past is a waste of my energy.
60. “I cannot change the past.
61. “The codependent habits I learned in my early years served me well then.
62. “Today, I choose to leave them behind.
63. “I look forward to a better future.” (May it be true).
64. Language of Letting Go Nov. 17: “Grief and Action
65. “Trust in God and do something.” Mary Lyon
66. “It’s important to let ourselves grieve as a passage between yesterday and tomorrow.
67. “But we do not have to be controlled unduly by our grief, or our pain.
68. “There are times when we have grieved, surrendered to the heaviness, tiredness, and weariness of a circumstance long enough.
69. “It becomes time to break out.
70. “It comes time to take action.
71. “We will know when it’s time to break the routine of grieving.
72. “There will be signs within and aroud us.
73. “We will become tired of the heaviness.
74. “An idea will occur;
75. “an opportunity will present itself.
76. “We may think: No. Too much effort…Do it anyway.
77. “Try something.
78. “Reach out.
79. “Stretch.
80. “Do something unusual, something different,
81. “something special.
82. “A new activity may help trigger the transformation process.
83. “Stay up two hours later than usual!
84. “Make an appointment to do something for yourself that is different from what you usually do.
85. “Visit someone you haven’t seen in year.
86. “Do something to encourage and help the new energy coming your way.
87. “We may not feel ike breaking out of grief.
88. “It may feel safer, easier, to remain in our cocoon.
89. “Begin pushing out anyway.
90. “Test the walls of your cocoon.
91. “Push.
92. “Push a little harder.
93. “It may be time to emerge.
94. “Today, I will trust God and the process, but I will also take action to help myself feel better.
95. I will do a good/great job at work today.
96. That it’s going to be cold over the next few days, and at least I have some heat.
97. That I just took out most of the recycling.
98. And it felt good out there.
99. I liked the cool, and *might * even wind up keeping the house heat lower still.
100. And stretching my legs felt good.
101. And then I walked doggie.
102. And she liked it.
103. And I’m about to have a healthy breakfast.