Grats

I am grateful:

1. Kale yesterday
2. And more for today
3. Healthy breakfast soon this morning
4. Some sleep last night
5. Not coughing when lying down
6. Heat in the house
7. New furnace
8. Although I have a cough, I can breathe on my own and am so very grateful for that.
9. The concepts in the book The Secret
10. That J. called last night.
11. And was nice.
12. I think he has some ambivalence. I could be wrong. But I’m grateful if he does.
13. My time with M’s class yesterday.
14. That I gave her the present for her daughters.
15. That I am not sitting here listening to the old furnace making all those noises, and wondering how long it might last.
16. Lifeline with AutoAlert. Maybe I’ll switch to that one for my mother.
17. Soup
18. My eyesight
19. Being more in a state of gratitude lately.
20. Today’s For Today: “It is impossible to live pleasurably without living wisely, well and justly, and impossible to live wisely, well and justly without living pleasurably.” Epicurus
21. “Living pleasurably meant giving myself all the food I wanted when I wanted it.” I am grateful to recognize myself in this line.
22. “Unlike normal people, who partake of the pleasure of eating with moderation, I was hooked on food.” And here too.
23. “Soon, what once seemed pleasurable began exacting a price that drained all my resources – physical, emotional and spiritual.” Yes. And it’s a gift that that happens.
24. “I learned what all addicts eventually come to know: it is impossible to use any substance or activity to excess – be it food, alcohol, drugs or gambling – and live either wisely or pleasurably.” I’m glad to be hearing this and finally figuring it out.
25. “For today: I ask the help of a Power greater tan myself to moderate my eating and give myself the pleasure of living wisely, well and justly.”
26. And this is true with tv also. I’m glad that last night I did a little piano during tv time.
27. I’m glad that I don’t eat palm oil anymore, because of the unbearably things I saw that they do to the orangutans.
28. And that Earth Balance does not do that, according to their long explanatory statement that Mad showed me
29. Oh wow. This is deep. Today’s Voices of Recovery: “I used to want things to be clearly black or white, so the rules were known and static. That way when I emerged from a time lost to bingeing, nothing would have changed.” Yes. I recognize that. A lot.
30. “I don’t want that anymore.
31. “This is stagnation and a slow, agonizing death at the hands of my disease of compulsive overeating.” Yes. Wow.
32. “Today I know that change is constant.
33. “I can choose to judge that as a negative, victimizing problem, or as a dynamic evolution toward a healthy, happy, and hopeful reality filled with wonder and awe.
34. “I choose the wonder and awe when I ‘assume a posture of humility,’
35. “give thanks for my life to my Higher Power
36. “and ask for another day of abstinence
37. “and the opportunity to do service for others.”
38. Today’s In This Moment: “I was brought up with the ‘food will solve everything’ mentality. Fall down? Have a cookie. Relationship problems? Ice cream to the rescue. Bad day at work? Donuts in the break room.
39. “I now realize that when I’m craving chocolate there’s usually something going on internally; an issue needs to be dealt with.
40. “…but I also need to take some action: call a friend, go to a meeting, connect with my sponsor, or write in my journal.
41. “Food doesn’t solve my problems.”
42. And that is in the CoDA book, not the OA book. Guess I needed to see that too.
43. Today’s Language of Letting Go: “Gratitude and acceptance are two magic tricks available to us in recovery.
44. “No matter who we are, where we are, or what we have, gratitude and acceptance work.
45. “We may eventually become so happy that we realize our present circumstances are good.” Oh yay!
46. “Or we master our present circumstances and then move forward into the next set of circumstances.” Ok too.
47. “If we become stuck, miserable, feeling trapped and hopeless, try gratitude and acceptance.
48. “If we have tried unsuccessfully to alter our present circumstances and have begun to feel like we’re beating our head against a brick wall, try gratitude and acceptance.
49. “If we feel like all is dark and the night will never end, try gratitude and acceptance.
50. “If we feel scared and uncertain, try gratitude and acceptance.
51. “If we’ve tried everything else and nothing seems to work, try gratitude and acceptance.
52. “If we’ve been fighting something, try gratitude and acceptance.
53. “When all else fails, go back to the basics.
54. “Gratitude and acceptance work.
55. “Today, God, help me let go of my resistance.
56. “Help me know that pain of a circumstance will stop hurting so much if I accept it.” Oh I hope so.
57. “I will practice the basics of gratitude and acceptance in my life, and for all my present circumstance.” Okay. Must do that. Yes.
58. That I can swallow.
59. That my heart works
60. And my lungs
61. And I do not have any dread disease (except compulsive overeating).
62. That I have been to Disneyland
63. I am grateful that J loved me for as long as he did, and that he may still.
64. I am grateful for warm clothes.
65. And that I will buy a coat soon, I think.
66. And even makeup.
67. And a little perfume.
68. And the shopping fun I’ve had with O.
69. And reading with MA.
70. Water
71. Word Mines – Dell
72. Spellathon
73. Figgerits
74. Quotation Puzzles
75. Baths
76. Showers
77. Phone calls
78. Hot lunch for today
79. Greens for today
80. Hot tea
81. When not talking, not coughing.
82. Used a couple minutes to practice piano last night.
83. Traffic reports
84. Weather reports
85. That I’ve never been in a really serious accident with long-term bodily damage.
86. That I healed from that accident that cost me a year.
87. Hope.
88. Good books.
89. Boggle
90. That I’m not quite as shy and scared as I used to be.
91. God in my life
92. Eating better
93. My hands
94. And all they can do. Typing.
95. Piano
96. Writing
97. Sewing
98. Embroidery
99. Crochet
100. Knitting