Holy Moly - It's Actually My FIRST Date!

Well, at 14, my other first date, I was in NEED.
My mother was crazy.
I felt defective.
The boy was very handsome.
He chose me.
He even had a present for me, personalized with my name. ID bracelet - they were in at the time. Dainty and pretty.
And he kissed me. Mouths closed. And he had kind of large lips and it felt like heaven. Mostly, I felt - yup - safe.
So I spent the next 4 years NEEDING him. (Or so I thought).

And so it was
again and again

Today is my first date.
As in,
someone wants to see me today, and I him, and it might be fun,
****and I need NOTHING from him - so I have nothing to lose -
I am an adult, getting there on my own, to maybe have a nice time.

Wow.