Sense of Calm

There are miracles.
There are.

My heart has been broken by J.
I am worried about my mother.
I am dependent on his outlook for whether I face financial ruin (the law is really stupid!)
I'm exhausted.

But
I have a sense of calm.
Not denial.
Not euphoria.
Just calm.

I think it's acceptance.
Like, "I will do all I can in the smartest ways possible, and then I will let go."

Plus, I'm excited about England!

Plus, French!

It's like:
I'm glad I'm alive!
I look forward to things!
But I live in the moment.
And I'm not horribly stressed.
Oh My God I am so grateful!

I, who a year ago wanted to throw myself behind a moving car (backing up).

This
gratitudes
readings
CoDA work
OA
Affirmations
prayer
do-the-next-right-thing
Listen to really smart people like EJ, JJ, and Birdie,
and have some fun
and take care of the body

stuff

really works!

If *you* are suffering, DO NOT GIVE UP!
Things change.
I "knew" they couldn't for me,
and yet they did. They are.

It is the time of the worst circumstances for me, and yet I'm okay.
Plus who knows what tomorrow will bring?
And who knows what I'll decide to do with it?

Life is an adventure.
I accept that now.
And instead of looking for security,
I embrace the real thing: life on life's terms.

And it's wonderful

Bless you all!